Wednesday, 29 April 2015


the glass above me, black
with velvet hours and heavy
i was wearing my elbows in again, wringing
wrists like my future self. pre-emptively arthritic
in the mind

but i get these day dreams
neck-to-neck with rationality, competing in jest
like a reunion match for nostalgia’s sake

he was rattling toward me, big
chunks of metal and plastic grating on the bitumen.
i could imagine the smell of warmth
the bodies at rush hour

i could imagine his head, big lollypop
glazed eyes lolling along the scenery

and later, combing his hair down the middle,
slighted by the oncoming troop, ruthless
the regime of self doubt

monday. second guessing-
the dullness of the street and its personal lack of traffic
the cars that do are yellow
dimmed like old photographs

the photo, with my eyes closed and her teeth open
dark browns and greys, a smokey palate
for the palliative

her fingers got skinny like fine smooth branches
placed the ring in my hand said look after this
went back to her pudding, never left

with my compass i set the altar north and salted
my little prayers. who is this tinny voice
my personal cheshire, little grinning cherub
no longer earthbound

talking back the days through ashes
and the flowers from their cremation

Thursday, 16 April 2015

Tuesday, 14 April 2015

seasonal diary


for me, it was endless
the lapping of the day, the weather
looking for ways to slow my heart beat

she was there, her slow geography
merging with my usual context
sitting in the garden, eating crumbs of sedation

the university grounds
pooling around me
like the greyness of a shopping centre

and when the night time came i met him
down a crooked street, we walked hand in hand
ordered chinese, ate with silver chopsticks
mashed our tongues together in the cold of 8pm

later, minutes, happily aneasthetised
reading horoscopes and swaying round the platform
closed my eyes the whole way home
shimmering over lamp lit gutters

sunday night i climbed aboard his bed of doubt
and all was dark save for laptop screen.
when i woke
my personal groundhog day
greeted me with familiar hurricane

i worked it out, though
got through all the admin stuff
got to the core, my little cup
tipping lively down the throat of struggle

we woke to fuck and slept again
fed the dog and watched the moon

her clean kindness shone
in my feigned domestic sovereignty
and weariness felt lighter
when i let all that muck settle down

bodies curled like question marks, turning like a key
tonight i’ll continue my little hobby
of rewiring my brain.