I go through these periods of intense restructuring. It feels molecular & beyond prediction. Nesting in my room I tackle surfaces laden with material mementos and feel all shades of rawness in regards to my obsession with the past. I sit in my bed eating mandarin segments after coming home from work; some states of fatigue are blissful in their accompanying mental clarity.
I throw myself into the process of intuitive action so fully that I feel completely stripped of mental scaffolding; previous neural pathways of assisted decision-making now loom suspicious — breaking trust with myself in order to build it anew. We rattle into the physical and form new questions to digest at night. I’m working on some answers.
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